Funny Football News Zaha Sane Kroos

So what funny football news do we have in store for this fine Thursday? You might have noticed we didn’t turn up for work yesterday. There really was nothing to report, funny or otherwise. Still, reprimand in hand, we are here now and ready to have a crack.

Isn’t Wilfried Zaha a nice boy? Yesterday, Crystal Palace announced to the Ladies team that they would all have to pay £250 each to be registered to play for them this coming season. Yes, this is from the club that pays Christian Benteke upward of £50k a week to be utter dog poo. Yet Wilf, a proper Palace lad, has stepped in to not only pay the fees but to offer “substantial” financial support to the amateur club. Wilf, it is not often I applaud a professional footballer in this column but I applaud you right here, right now.

Joe Gomez is of a generation that might just be starting to answer “who?” when they get told they play a little bit like Bobby Moore. Fortunately, Joe knows a bit about football history (or he noticed Moore’s image quite a lot over the summer when that whole #itscominghome charade was in full flow). He’d have been in Russia himself if he had not been injured but he is back in the squad for the Spain game and, most likely, playing. Three from Kyle Walker, Joe Gomez, John Stones and Harry Maguire suddenly feels alright, doesn’t it?

I’m almost tempted to take this Nations League stuff seriously as there is a trophy at the end of it – not that England will win it, of course. But, has to be better than friendlies, right?

Hang on a minute, it says here John Terry is being linked to Manchester United?! As what? Surely not as an actual player? God, they mean it. John Terry might be reunited with Jose Mourinho. If this isn’t Jose sticking two fingers up to the Manchester United board and saying “look at what you have reduced me to” then I don’t know what is. This is actually worse than picking Ander Herrera in a back three.

I’m also reading that Liverpool‘s “people” have been speaking to PSG’s “people” about a move for Adrian Rabiot who is available on a free as of January. He is represented by his mum, however, so I suggest the Reds send Jurgen around for a cup of tea.

Finally today; according to Real Madrid‘s regular-title-winning-midfielder Toni Kroos, Leroy Sane has to improve his body language if he wants to be a great player. I don’t know, Toni. Dropping the shoulder and speeding past players seems to be working for him so far.