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That big BANG you heard this morning was not leftover fireworks from various New Year’s Eve parties on the Kings Road. Oh, no. That was the sound of the starter’s pistol for the January 2019 Transfer Window.

Chelsea have blinked first, but I am not really sure if this one even counts given that USA international Christian Pulisic will be signing for Chelsea for €58m or something, but then immediately loaned back to Borussia Dortmund for the rest of their Bundesliga chasing season.

Oh, and Pulisic’s BVB contract was up in the summer – so how on earth has that added up to needing to spend €58m on him?

Anyway, this news is hardly going to cheer up young Callum Hudson-Odoi who was greeted with this kind of chat in the the Chelsea loans WhatsApp group this morning.

Tammy Abraham messaged “Brooooooo, you’re going to be playing at Rotherham next season, how does that feel? ???”

Mason Mount responded with, “????”

Lewis Baker piped up with, “Leeds is great in September boi, freshers innit ???”

And Jake Salter-Clarke messaged something in Dutch, showing off how he has learned a new language at Vitesse.

Of course, none of this actually happened but it is clear that Callum Hudson-Odoi is going to be ‘developing his game’ somewhere else very soon.

Especially after Maurizio Sarri said Hudson-Odoi needed to be ‘patient as wins are more important right now’. Nice one Sarri, that’s almost out of the Jose Mourinho school of man-management.

Following Manchester City getting back on the horse named winning on Sunday, Peppy G claimed that Oleksandr Zinchenko was ‘the best player on the pitch’ after they way he reacted to gifting Southampton their equaliser and then giving away a penalty that was, unsurprisingly, not given considering that City needed to win to keep this title-race narrative alive. I mean, we couldn’t have both City and Spurs getting out of Liverpool’s way this early, could we?

Zinchenko got his head back in the game well enough to supply a pin-point cross for Sergio Aguero and, according to Pep, was ‘brave’. Well, at least he didn’t go and get himself sent off, eh Fabian?

Liverpool gaffer Jurgen Klopp has responded to the mere suggestion that Mohammed Salah is becoming a bit of a ‘diver’. Kloppo enquired whether we now need to see blood in the penalty area for it to be acceptable to award the spot-kick. I have to say, I am with the German on this one and I refer you back to my simple rule of thumb; if it would be given as a free kick anywhere else on the pitch, then it’s a penalty. End of.

Tottenham’s Mauricio Pochettino has said that a 3-0 win away at Cardiff City is what his team needed to give them ‘belief they can win the title’ once again. Now, now Poch. Surely, it is not away wins in Cardiff that should do this. Might I suggest beating your title rivals and not screwing up at ‘home‘ to Wolves?

Neil Warnock will have no doubt said to his players that is was important not to concede early. Therefore, Warnock will have been delighted to watch his skipper Sean Morrison smash the ball into Harry Kane’s knee and see it rebound into the corner of their net for the opening goal so early in the game. Harry Kane, eh? If he isn’t diving he’s scoring goals like that.

Unai Emery shuffled his pack once more for the visit of Fulham and the 11 cards that landed face-up took to the field against Claudio Ranieri’s men. Yo-Pierre scored yet again and Fulham collapsed, yet again.

You see, what Fulham should have actually done was appoint Nigel Pearson to keep them up. Then sack him and appoint Claudio. That’s the way it really works, you know?

Everton were absolutely terrible as they lost 1-0 at home to Leicester to give their fans hope for 2019. Jamie Vardy barely touched the ball but he doesn’t really need to when he gets at least one decent chance to gallop on to a through ball and slot it home for a winner.

Ahead of the visit of Manchester United tonight, Rafa Benitez is continuing his tough love at Newcastle. Benitez has once again reminded everyone just how difficult it is going to be for Newcastle to find three teams worse than them this season. You know what, Rafa? If you keep telling everyone how difficult it is going to be, maybe they will start believing that they are not actually good enough and you will get relegated. How about that?

As we said at the start of today’s ramblings, the 2019 January Transfer Window is open so expect the rumours to crank up from sublime to, frankly, ridiculous over the next few weeks.

And on that note, Inter have decided that they are in the market for a new right-back, left-back, right midfielder and left midfielder. The problem is, they can only really afford one so they’ve opted to put feelers out to someone who can play in all four. Manchester United’s Ashley Young is just about the right age to head off to Serie A now, and would like to take him on a free in the summer.

As we have already said, Claudio Ranieri’s Fulham are right up a certain creek sans paddle and seem to think that bringing in Chelsea’s Gary Cahill is enough of a paddle to keep them in the Premier League.

Rather than spend the non-existent transfer budget at Arsenal, Unai Emery is more likely to fire a quick SOS WhatsApp to Reiss Nelson and Calum Chambers and get them to return pronto. Arsenal are a bit light on numbers right now, despite having about 20 very talented Academy players chomping at the bit for more first-team minutes.

Reiss Nelson has, along with Jadon Sancho, blazed a certain trail for young English players in the Bundesliga so the aforementioned Calum Hudson-Odoi might try his luck over there and take Ruben Loftus-Cheek with him for a bit of company.

Another of the Chelsea loan squad, as we know, is Tammy Abraham who is banging in the goals for Aston Villa which has led to Wolves (who probably don’t really need him), Burnley and Huddersfield (who really, really do) wanting to make him a permanent employee of their football clubs.

Cesc Fabregas, remember him? Well, Thierry Henry has a huge issue with the average age of his Monaco squad and thinks that Cesc can help with that. Fabregas is likely to join the relegation-guaranteed side this month and will no doubt end up being the caretaker coach when they get shot of Henry by March.

Ralph Hasenhuttl doesn’t have room for Steven Davis at Southampton which is great news for Steven Gerrard and Rangers who, as it turns out, do. Davis is likely to return to Ibrox imminently.