That Was The Week That Was

We are now just two games into the season and Jose Mourinho‘s job is under threat, with Zinedine Zidane reportedly interested in replacing him.

Brighton pulled off the result of last weekend with a deserved 3-1 win over Manchester United. Despite United boasting two midfielders with a combined cost of £141m, it was £3m Dutchman Pascal Gross who looked the real deal on the day. Fantasy Team luxury Glenn Murray also got himself on the score sheet.

The Seagulls didn’t half get a helping hand from Victor Lindelof and in particular Eric Bailly. Pundit Gary Neville summed up the latter’s performance perfectly when he said Bailly was “In a three legged race with his legs tied together”

Pundit Alan Shearer called Sergio Aguero the Premier League’s greatest ever foreign player’ after his hat trick contributed to Man City’s 6-1 hammering of Huddersfield. He’s up there, but he’s no Federico Macheda. Anybody who watched the game would have appreciated the performance of one David Silva, who sliced the Terriers open at will.

In the Neil Warnock vs Rafa Benitez derby, the spoils were shared after an enjoyable (To those of us in attendance) goalless draw in South Wales. Obviously, the term ‘derby’ was used tongue in cheek. However, it was a real feisty game in which both teams should have been reduced to 10 men, as opposed to just Newcastle as a consequence of Isaac Hayden’s impressive 20 minute second half cameo.

In years to come, winger Kenedy will be remembered fondly in South Wales for putting in one of the worst performances at the Cardiff City Stadium that I have ever seen. It consisted of:

  • Finishing the first half with a 0% pass completion rate
  • Being lucky to escape a retrospective ban for lashing out at Victor Camarasa
  • Missed a 96th minute penalty
  • Achieved a paltry 40% take-on success rate

In an extraordinary turn of events, it’s turned out that the ‘feel good factor’ around West Ham during pre-season was merely a distraction by the owners to cover up the fact they are still an awful team. Last weekend’s 2-1 defeat at home to Bournemouth means West Ham have now lost more games at The London Stadium than they’ve won.

Now they are considering legal action against LS landlord E20, who are refusing to display the Club’s Honours List until a maintenance fee is paid for the big screen. The screen, just in case the club have not made it clear enough, is the largest projected digital screen in Europe.

Spanish hunk Alvaro Morata tasted his first competitive goal under Maurizio Saari as Chelsea overcame Unai Emery’s Arsenal 3-2. In truth, the goals from Mkhitaryan and Iwobi gave the scoreline a deceptively looking appearance, as it failed to portray Chelsea’s dominance for the vast majority of the match.

Richarlison’s bright start to his Everton career continued as he scored the decisive goal to see off Southampton with a 2-1 win, with ex-Saint Theo Walcott opening the scoring. So his confidence is understandably very high at the moment.

He professed “I want to be the top scorer of the league, take Everton back to the Champions League and reach the Brazilian national team.” He’ll have to wait until September 28th for FIFA 19’s release date. Joking aside, it’s a refreshing attitude from a young player. He can achieve a couple of those targets, no problem. Back to the Champions League however? Unattainable.

England’s leading marksman Harry Kane broke his August hoodoo when he bagged his side’s third goal to dismantle Fulham 3-1. Serbian striker Aleksandr Mitrovic’s equaliser ten minutes after half time proved to be in vain as the visiting supporters were forced to return home disappointed. Presumably, the costly beer prices at Wembley Stadium would have dampened their day more than the result itself.

It’s been a decent few days for Liverpool’s Mo Salah. On Monday night at Crystal Palace, he won the controversial penalty which James Milner duly converted. With seconds left on the clock, he ran the length of the field to set up Sadio Mane for Liverpool’s second.

No goals for the Egyptian then. Although, making the three man shortlist for UEFA’s player of the year alongside Cristiano Ronaldo and Luka Modric is a nice personal accolade. Meanwhile, during Roy Hodgson’s press conference yesterday, he took the unusual approach of starting a bitter feud with Harry the Hornet, Watford’s diving mascot.

And as a result of this, I can no longer distinguish between parody and reality in this world anymore.

Portuguese lovers Wolves are plenty of pundit’s tip to sneak into Europe this season. And you could see why, having lost 2-0 at 10 man Leicester. Party lover Jamie Vardy’s dangerous challenge on Matt Doherty meant he was given his marching orders.

What the press have not told us is (presumably because very little ink is set aside for things other than Jose Mourinho and Paul Pogba), that Jamie Vardy went into the dressing room to check up on Doherty to see if he was alright.

Following Sunday’s 3-1 defeat at Turf Moor by Watford, Burnley were back in European action on Thursday night as they flew to Greece to take on Olympiakos in the first leg of their UEFA Europa League play off. They weren’t helped by an abysmal referee who wrongly sent off Ben Gibson for ‘deliberate handball’.

And that’s your lot for this week.

Have a great weekend.