Getting Sacked In The Morning Jordan's Jabs Maurizio Sarri Chelsea

First Jab: Jose Mourinho – Third year script

I don’t know why the United fans are so surprised. Not with Jose Mourinho anyway? We know from vast experience that Jose cannot cope with his third year at a football club. Crumbled at Chelsea in his third. Rumbled at Real Madrid in his third year. Mind boggled in Manchester thus far also in his third year. Seemed obvious that Manchester United this year wouldn’t be able to challenge. Not with the big boys of the Premier League. Perhaps the board of clowns at Old Trafford should have seen this coming and axed Mourinho at the end of last year. Rather than threatening to do it on a cold autumn evening against Newcastle. It’s comical that people actually watched the game wondering if United could turn it around in the Premier League. We all already know the answer of that… the third year syndrome strikes again.

Second Jab: Tactical confusion from the ‘master tactician’

Questions were asked of Jose when he chose to go with the defensive mindset against the lesser teams of the Premier League. Not only was this a frustration for the fans it was also an embarrassment that ‘the chosen one’ feels he needs to set up his team in a way that they won’t concede and leak goals, against the teams that are struggling to find the back of the net anyway. Twice the manager has opted for this formation this season and United have failed to come out of the match with three points against Spurs & West Ham. The Hammers who lets not forget when the fixture came around hadn’t won at the London Stadium all season – just let that sink in. Eyebrows of the fans were fully raised when the master tactician ejected his thirty million pound centre half and replaced him with Juan Mata. Dropping a 21-year-old attacking midfielder into a central defenders role somewhere he had never been positioned before.

Upper cut: Mourinho felt the blow

It was Mourinho’s ex: Kennedy who hit first and slotted past David De Gea to put Newcastle one nil up. Ninety seconds later the Japanese Muto muted the Theatre Of Dreams. I can only imagine at that moment that Jose felt like Conor McGregor after Khabib defeated him in UFC 229.

Counter-punch: The two M’s revive Mourinho

The usual Manchester United comeback was well and truly on when Juan Mata curled a wonderful free kick into the bottom right corner. With the fans now awake and chanting you could almost sense that an equaliser was soon to follow. Pogba’s performance in the second half was just a glimpse of what the Frenchmen is capable of. It was all about the French for United’s equaliser with wonderful link up between Pogba and Martial with the tricky winger slotting home the second.

Final Blow: Written in the stars

It was Alexis Sanchez who saved Jose’s skin with an injury time winner (come on don’t act surprised it’s Manchester United.) The Chilean who hadn’t been performing for the manager decided that he would come up with the goods to save his job even if it is just an extension of a couple of weeks – who knows?

As everyone suspected Jose Mourinho’s Manchester United would take all the main headlines once again. The game felt staged. The way they fought back and bailed the manager out of the rubble. Spectators felt like this was a typical Mourinho stunt. Doing this so he could gloat and prove that this is why he’s “the special one” and one of the best managers ever, and hopefully so he could gain some of the respect that he believe he lost from us journo’s.