funny football news fantasy football gameweek 8

Oh, well hello there Matchday 7 and another week of red arrows. Admit it, you don’t read this to see me do well, do you? Of course not. And I never, ever will.

It’s another week of Fantasy Football Failings and total utter dross.

Read on for bad selections, bad performances and general bad Fantasy Football Management.

Fantasy Football Failings Matchday 7

Look at that mess. Just look at it. Mind you, I was unlikely to do well when I have three Manchester United players in my side, was I? I must remember to fix that.

David de Gea, Manchester United: 1 point

He let in three against West Ham United. Who does that? United, obviously.

Kyle Walker, Manchester City: 7 points

No rotation for Kyle this week as I managed to just about second-guess Peppy G. A clean-sheet was my reward.

Trent Alexander-Arnold, Liverpool: 2 points

A rare low scoring effort from TAA this week but they were playing Chelsea and, of course, Eden Hazard.

Davinson Sanchez, Tottenham Hotspur: 7 points

Let’s not get too carried away, they were playing Huddersfield. With hindsight, I should have brought in another Tottenham defender given Huddersfield haven’t scored at home in five matches.

Sadio Mane, Liverpool: 1 point

He’s gone right off the boil, has Sadio. Ever since I signed him, curiously.

Marouane Fellaini, Manchester United: 2 points

No last minute equalisers from the Big Tree this week but he is probably the one United player I shall retain moving forwards.

Roberto Pereyra, Watford: 2 points

Have I signed him just as his and Watford’s form turns? Of course I have!

Jean-Michel Seri, Fulham: 2 points

See above. Another one I need to move on.

Dele Alli, Tottenham Hotspur: 0 points

Injured, isn’t he. And for at least another week. Jeez.

Romelu Lukaku, Manchester United: 2 points

I genuinely ummed and arred about bringing Harry Kane back this week. Yeah, I know. Typical. If I had brought Kane back, you know who would have scored a brace.

Sergio Aguero, Manchester City: 16 points

Thank god he played. Thank god he scored. Thank god I made him skipper.

Total: 42 points

Below average, just for a change.

I am at my wit’s end. I need to get rid of De Gea, Seri and Lukaku at the very least and Pereyra, Mane and Fellaini are on my mind as well. I think I might have to play that free hit thing for next week and have a complete clean sweep.

As ever folks, watch what I do and then do the complete and utter opposite, right