Welcome to the second week of My Fantasy Football Failings and it is exactly what it says on the tin. This week I made the mistake of trying to second-guess Peppy G and missed out on some easy points as a result.
That said, you know you are pushing water up a hill when the first game of the weekend has an injury-time penalty that your player promptly misses. Thanks a bunch, Kenedy.
But yeah, Pep Guardiola. He has a squad ripe for rotation and that could become a dangerous theme of this season for me. I had Sergio Aguero as my captain last week and he didn’t score. I wasn’t convinced he wasn’t even going to play this weekend so I made Sadio Mane captain and of course, what happened was inevitable.
Just another weekend in the life of me and Fantasy Football, basically so shall we take a look?
Not the best, eh? But then, is it ever? You don’t read this, all ten of you, to see me successful do you!
David de Gea, Manchester United: 1 point
DDG somehow ended up on my bench last week so I thought it was the right thing to do to select him considering United were playing Brighton. Away. Without the pressure of the Old Trafford faithful. The problem De Gea had was not his performance, far from it. It was the other ten muppets.
Kyle Walker, Manchester City: 0 points
Rested, I presume? Thanks, Pep. Last week Kyle Walker was being talked about as if he was an English Cafu, this weekend he was putting his feet up. How does that help anyone?
Trent Alexander-Arnold, Liverpool: Tonight
I think I might have fallen into the Liverpool trap. I’m expecting them to blow Palace away tonight which can mean only one thing – there won’t be a clean sheet in sight.
Davinson Sanchez, Tottenham Hotspur: 2 points
Tottenham managed to get one over their London rivals, Fulham but a clean sheet escaped them. I’m not overly concerned, Sanchez gets in the box for set-pieces often enough to give me confidence that he will do some damage at some point.
Sadio Mane, Liverpool: Tonight
Yeah, I signed Sadio to replace KDB and I have made him captain this week. Anything less than a brace and an assist and I will be wishing I’d picked Fellaini.
Kenedy, Newcastle United: 1 point
There is so much potential to come from this kid this season, all good things that will happen to Rafa’s lot will come through him. He won the penalty, he missed the penalty. I still believe though, I still believe.
Dele Alli, Tottenham Hotspur: 5 points
Yeah Dele, yeah. In the week where he was asked to distract the world from the fact that Tottenham have screwed up their new stadium plans, Alli got an assist. He’s made a decent start to the new season.
Ruben Neves, Wolverhampton Wanderers: 2 points
Are we going to see that Neves isn’t actually that good this season? Maybe. Either way, he’ll be involved in set-pieces and stuff and Wolves must kick into action soon?
Joselu, Newcastle United: 2 points
It was a straight toss up between Joselu and his teammate Jamaal Lascelles this week. Jamaal got 8 points that I will never see as I chose Joselu. Lovely.
Harry Kane, Tottenham Hotspur: 7 points
He only went and bloody scored in August. The curse is broken, dammit. Just a couple of hat-tricks over the next few weeks Harry and all is well again, no?
Sergio Aguero, Manchester City: 20 points
Yeah, imagine if I had left him as captain. Jeez.
Total (before tonight): 40 points
As it stands, for the second week, I am distinctly below average which is about right. Yet, I still think I have a squad here where good things can happen. They just need to happen soon. And I still need to understand the rules better.